Is Your Child Off to College? Be Prepared!
I hope you’re having a great spring! May is pretty quiet for me. This is the month when I start to say goodbyes to all of my amazing, inspiring clients who are graduating. My seniors are settled, for the most part, and my other clients, who are rising 9th-12th graders, are focused on performing well on year-end exams and AP testing. If you’re sending your child off to college this fall, however, you may have a lot on your plate and mind right now. Personally, I can relate.
As we readied ourselves for my daughter’s high school graduation, I could only think of what was right in front of me—the parties, travel plans, decorating her dorm, and finding a perfect roommate (We went random, and it was a match made in heaven, by the way!). In retrospect, I should’ve been focusing on her well-being since I now had very little authority or influence on her physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
One night at the end of her sophomore year, my daughter, Avery, called me crying in the middle of the night—any parent’s worst nightmare, of course. What she’d believed to be a bad cold had progressed quickly to an inability to swallow and a 104-degree fever, so I had no choice but to encourage her to go to the emergency room. I was worried sick. Avery was 2,000 miles away from me and had never been to the doctor alone—she was terrified, and I was crushed not to be by her side. Ultimately, she caught mononucleosis and, thankfully, could be released from school 3 weeks early to be able to nurse back to health at home. But, boy, what a wake-up call!
That experience taught me a valuable lesson—be prepared for the unexpected. Realizing how little could be done to help my daughter from afar because she was over 18 years old was a reality check. I immediately contacted my friend and attorney, Ryan Scafidel, who walked me through how I could protect Avery and be prepared for the worst.
For this newsletter, I’ve asked Ryan Scafidel and Holly Garrity to prepare some information on Powers of Attorney for me to share to help you make decisions regarding the protection of your child at college.
Additionally, I’ll be sharing mental health tips and resources from Katye Iriwn, NCC, LPC-S, plus my faith development tools featured in the Magnolia Method to help you feel more equipped to tend to your child’s well-being from afar. Let’s get started!
Let’s Talk about the
power of attorney
from Ryan Scafidel and Holly Garrity
As a parent, it's a great idea to consider getting a Power of Attorney (POA) for your child once they turn 18. Of course, you never want to think that something may happen to them while they are away at college, but if it does, it’s important to be prepared.
Once a child turns 18, their parents no longer have the authority to make medical or financial decisions for them. POA documents authorize parents to help their adult children manage financial, legal, and health care decisions as needed. Without a Power of Attorney, parents could be prevented from helping their children in their best interests.
For example, suppose your child becomes incapacitated and has not signed a POA. In that case, you may be required to ask a court to appoint a guardian or conservator to handle decisions. This can be a complex and expensive process that having a Power of Attorney will eliminate.
POAs can further be useful for the following circumstances:
Healthcare decisions: With a POA, you can make medical decisions on their behalf if they're unable to do so due to illness, injury, or incapacitation.
Financial matters: A POA allows you to manage their financial affairs, such as accessing bank accounts, paying bills, or handling financial aid, if they're unavailable or need assistance.
Legal and administrative tasks: A POA can help you navigate legal or administrative issues, like dealing with university administrative tasks, handling legal documents, or communicating with authorities.
Privacy laws: Laws like HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) and FERPA (Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act) restrict sharing personal information without consent. A POA ensures you can access necessary information and make decisions on their behalf.
Peace of mind: Having a POA in place can give you and your child added security, knowing that someone trusted can step in if needed.
There are different types of Powers of Attorney, so consult a legal professional to determine the best option for you. Additionally, it’s important to discuss this with your child and understand their preferences and boundaries. It’s essential to respect their autonomy while also being prepared for any situations that may arise.”
If you live in Louisiana, I highly recommend Ryan Scafidel and Holly Garrity of Audubon Title in New Orleans to prepare a POA and any related legal documents for you. They can be reached at 504-485-0211.
Mental health pro-tips
from Katye Irwin, NCC, LPC-S
Right now, anxiety is heightened in ways I haven’t observed in my 25-year career before. Mounting stress can lead to isolation, a rocky transition, and unhealthy habits forming at the onset of college.
Some schools offer better mental health services than others, so investigate wait times and read campus mental health services reviews. Many states prohibit seeing clients for counseling across state lines, so have a plan in place before your child is in crisis.
Katye Irwin, NCC, LPC-S, is another amazing local resource for people in Louisiana. She has been assisting families in making the transition to college for over 20 years! Along with her exclusive counseling package for local families (scroll for more info!), she has provided some helpful tips and advice for our newsletter below.
“The time has finally come for your child to leave the nest and head off to college. As much as you have tried to prepare yourself and your child for this time, it is normal to be nervous while starting this exciting journey. Here are some important things to consider when you are speaking to your college-bound child about emotional readiness:
- Remind them that there is an adjustment period and to be patient. This could be a good time to share some of your own experiences.
- Normalize being homesick. Reaching out to family and friends can be helpful.
- Stress the importance of self-care: exercise, sleep, nutrition, routine.
- Emphasize the importance of social connections—encourage researching clubs they might be interested in joining. Consider the possibility of going through sorority or fraternity rush or playing intramural sports.
- Schedule regular family check-ins—it can be helpful to set up days and times to FaceTime and check in on a regular basis.
- Do they currently see a therapist, and if so, will they continue with them virtually, or should you get recommendations for someone near campus? Have a plan.”
Katye is offering a 3-session series to help college-bound students prepare to navigate their journey ahead. The sessions will help the student understand the college environment, set goals, and create a personalized roadmap. Students will learn coping strategies and resilience-building techniques. Each student will finish the 3 sessions feeling more confident and more prepared to start college.
Session 1: Mapping Your Path- Understand the college environment, set goals, and create a personalized roadmap.
Session 2: Thriving Amid Change- Equip students with coping strategies and resilience-building techniques. It is also important to help them manage expectations.
Session 3: Navigating Challenges and Resources- Familiarize students with campus resources and encourage proactive problem-solving.
The session packages are offered in person or virtually during June, July, and August for $400. If interested, please reach out to Katye via email: kirwinlpc@gmail.com!
Last but certainly not least, let’s talk about spiritual and faith development in college. Many of my clients have a strong faith identity and a community tied to their church or synagogue, which is reflected in their personalized roadmaps.
Additionally, check out The Hillel or any faith-based organizations on campus so that your child can continue to nurture their spiritual development on their own terms if they so choose. Many campuses have weekly or even daily services available at school.
If this is important to your family and your child, do your homework ahead of time. My clients represent many faiths, but two resources that I find especially helpful are Catholic Higher Ed and Hillel International.
Whether you’re a student, parent, teacher, or advisor—you recognize the tremendous benefit of higher education and its impact on shaping one’s future. And no matter your role within this incredibly defining decision-making process, it can be a stressful time for you.
I’m here to be your advisor, organizer, tutor, cheerleader, friend, and compass through this journey. I’ve helped over 2,000 students locate and gain acceptance to the college of their dreams, and I’m so excited to help you, too.
Let’s get to work!
-Allie Pierson, Founder